Understanding Bisexuals – Take a Look
An individual who has an attraction towards both men and women is referred to as bisexual or it is mentioned as bisexuality. When understanding about bisexuality many individuals think how is it possible to be attracted to more than one sex or gender, as people do not take time to understand what really bisexuality is so bisexual people are ignored from queer community as they criticize bisexual individuals for their preferences of capable of getting attracted to both the genders. Lesbians and Gay people discriminate against them at a higher rate. Bisexual people find it hard trying to fit in the heterosexual world and in Queer world. Often it is mentioned or branded as immoral or it can’t be true or it is considered as an escaping technique in the world following social norms.
2 Why should we Understand ?
Like homosexuality, Asexuality, or any other preferences, bisexuality is also a preference or orientation or identity or attraction that an individual has on the other person be it a man or woman. We understand in this world many different personalities live with us and we try our best to go with those personalities by understanding them in a different way. So why can’t we try to understand the bisexual people? Instead of ignoring them within the community and making them “Invisible” by spreading hatred against them. Let us help ourselves in understanding bisexual individuals why? because we all belong to the same peer and it is important to know and understand about every one
- There is no right or wrong way of finding their attraction towards someone.
- When we understand Pansexuals, Non-Binary, Queer, Asexual individual’s orientations, and preferences, then it is simple to understand bisexual’s preferences too.
- No Gene or hormones are related to homosexuality, Asexuality or Bisexuality, so its the individuals’ preferences to get attracted to one or more genders.
- Do not judge or criticize or discriminate against other’s preferences by their orientation.
We have to always remember that everyone faced this discrimination in the society for loving same-sex/gender person, or for not having romantic feelings for someone or for identifying ourselves as transgender or for saying that ” Gender Fluid or Pansexual or any other orientations” after the acceptance from the law and from part of society it doesn’t mean that entire society has understood and accepted, no still not, many individuals face the same issues regularly from their friends & family members. So more than others, we know the exact pain and hurt when someone discriminates us for who we love and criticize our preferences. it is time to understand we are not supposed to do the same kind of discrimination to our peer group bisexual individuals.
3 Myths & Realities about Bisexuals?
Some of the myths & the realities surrounded to is what I am writing here to make everyone to understand Bisexual people and show them support,understanding,love,care & affections. Make a place from them in the community by understanding their “visibility”.
- Is it a Phase?
There is a Myth prevailing that Bisexual people are in a Phase, to be open sexual preferences may or may not change in course of time but there is no need to add a label for every orientation. If you label a person it adds limitations towards those individuals. Consider it as their preferences, they are human as you are. learn to understand everyone’s perspective and preferences.
2. They have lovers in both the genders
Love is the most incredible feeling, we know that and love has got many different meanings too. Romantic love, Parental Love, Friendly Love, etc and in general love is referred to as showing care and affection towards others. Having this a bigger reference lets think and understand that bisexual people are attracted to both genders they can get attracted and fall in love with a man and woman but that doesn’t explain that at the same time they have lovers in both the genders. They have their choice to choose from both the genders depending upon what they need. So no judgment is needed in this. Let us face the harsh truth that many gays and lesbians love multiple partners. There is no right and wrong in love, it’s their life, their preferences and orientation, and their choices to be with who they want.
3. They do not become straight or gay when they are in relationship
Let us first understand that bisexuality is an orientation meaning that people are interested or attracted either to men or women but they can choose according to their wants and need. So this doesn’t either make them Straight or Gay, they are who they are. Labels don’t define the person. There is no special evidence or proof as to why they are attracted to both the genders. Many people underestimate that bisexual people are “swingers” and they do not know what they want. It is not to be termed like that, bisexual individuals are attracted to both genders but they too understand what do they want & to whom they are attracted or inclined more. Why do we have to label people by their preferences? The ultimate point in a relationship is, to be honest with your partner.
4. They cannot be in a monogamous relationship
Really we should think about this point, Only bisexual people cannot be in a monogamous relationship? it is not true to simply criticize a bisexual person with this term. All the way from the ancient times our society has accepted polygamy and non-monogamy(Non-monogamy (or nonmonogamy) is an umbrella term for every practice or philosophy of non-dyadic intimate relationship that does not strictly hew to the standards of monogamy, particularly that of having only one person with whom to exchange sex, love, and/or affection. In that sense, “nonmonogamy” may be accurately applied to extramarital sex, group marriage, or polyamory) with the consent form the other gender. Even now we can see many people be it Straight, Gay, Bisexual, or any other orientation (except Asexual people) all most they enter into non-monogamous relationships or polygamy, so specifically pointing that bisexual people cannot be in a monogamous relationship, is totally unfair.
Having a monogamous relationship is a person’s wish and need. It is good if a person is in a monogamous relationship for a healthier love life, but people not having a monogamous relationship can’t be blamed it’s their life, their happiness.
5. They cannot be trusted.
It is really funny to hear that bisexual people cannot be trusted, so can we trust others like can we trust Straight person, Gay person, or any Queer person? If a person wants to cheat they will cheat its not the sexual orientation or sexual preferences that make them cheat.
6. They are confused about their sexuality
We all are confused about sexuality at one point of our lifetime and research says that sexuality changes time to time some may find it in a younger age, some may understand about their sexuality in the late 35’s, some they knew about their sexuality but they do not want to reveal until they are the 50s or 60s. So sexuality is a process that everyone goes through when we try to understand ourselves. The world’s best Psychologist and the pioneer of psychoanalysis Sigmund Freud believed that all humans were bisexual, by which he primarily meant that everyone incorporates aspects of both sexes and that everyone is sexually attracted to both sexes. Reading this are we not confused about our sexuality. Many researchers are studying related to women being bisexuals or gay rather than straight. So getting confused with sexuality is bound to happen to everyone, not just with bisexual people.
Taking all these into considerations, it is an appropriate time to understand that bisexual people are humans and they deserve the same love, respect, care, and affection. Be bisexuals doesn’t make them any lesser. Being a part of Queer community, it is our responsibility to support, understand, and guide them instead of criticizing or discriminating bisexuals. All are equal & important. Everyone deserves to be happier with whom they want to be.